Flying Rant

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Have you ever flown before?

You most likely have. Even if it was for a short jaunt to a few states away. Now, the majority of you, actually the overwhelming majority of you haven’t flown on a private jet. If that’s how you fly, then lucky you, and this post probably won’t pertain to you per se.

But the rest of us, who have the fly with the great unwashed will understand the pain which I am about to lay out for you. I’m just going to lay it out how it is. No sugar-coating.

Flying is a SERIOUS pain in the ass.

It’s not like it used to be. You used to get preferential treatment if you paid a little more, early boarding if you had a child, and the elderly used to get early boarding as well. But no. All that is gone.

You have a little kid, you can wait with everyone else. You’re elderly, you can do the same, unless you’re in a wheel chair or are injured.

Now, I fly United (previously Continental), so I can only comment on what I see with them, but all around, the complains are quite the same. With United, you get boarded by group (which is new), and of course, on my most recently flight, I was group 5. The last group to board. Now that is whatever. I don’t care when I board. But…once on the plane, I wish I was number 1. They’ve limited how much you can bring on the plane, and they let you bring two carry on’s; one for the overhead and one for under the seat before you. That’s great and all, but being group 5 means….THERE IS NO OVERHEAD ROOM AS THE IDIOTS BEFORE AND BEHIND YOU TOOK YOUR SPOTS!

>An annoyed huff would leave from her lips.<

So you shove their shit out of the way and get your bag in. FINALLY. But you have the second bag, which, as I sat in an aisle seat, DIDN’T FIT because apparently they put the life vest before you in the aisle, so, I couldn’t fit it. Fantastic. -.-

Okay, so all that is out of the way. You sit down. Thank god. You made it. Now you can just re——.

The seats. Oh god. The seats. I mean come on. They don’t even put you sitting up right. It’s like they’re trying to push your head into your legs, making your torso and legs at a less than 90 degree angle.

How are you supposed to get comfortable sitting like that?

No. Freaking. Clue.

Eventually you can put your seat back a little bit. Key words. “Little bit.”

I mean, this is all just a pain in the ass.

You also have the food. I mean, thankfully since I went international they gave food. But it was like a snack. The portions are smaller, the food really isn’t great, and it doesn’t come until an hour into the flight.

And after my flight was delayed almost two hours because of gate changes and then a failure with the baggage belt, I was hungry. So, we didn’t eat till like 930pm or so.

Overall I hated it. Flying used to be enjoyable, but not anymore.

You’re constantly shoving the arm of the idiot next to you out of the way. And god-forbid you want to use the restroom and someone is coming your way AWAY from the bathroom, or visa versa. You have to like dive into the seat of a stranger to get out of the way.

And if you need to go when the food cart is in the way. Good luck. You’re gonna wish you wore your depends because they take forever and WILL NOT move.

Honestly, I can’t even say pay a little extra money to go first class because A) it’s not even a little bit of money. It’s a lot. And B) because first class isn’t much better. I flew Business a little while ago, maybe 2 years or so, and the seats were much smaller than when I had flown it once before, and overall it wasn’t anything HORRIBLY special. If you are going long distance in economy, I wish you luck and god-speed because I could barely survive 6 and a half hours. I watched that “time until destination” clock like my life depended on it.

Thankfully there were movies, but, that only helps so much.

But then on the way back, ughhhhhh. So like my button on the seat that helps it recline, I pushed it to recline slightly yet the damn bugger got stuck. So, for the rest of my flight, if I put pressure on my seat it would fall backwards. So, for the flight, which was 8 hours because of the tailwind, I had to sit up straight. To say I was unhappy was an understatement.

If you have similar experiences, please tell me and let’s get this rant going. Because I can’t be the only one who hates this. I know I’m not.

So where y’all who hate flying? Raise your hand! >Raises her hands and legs and waves them around.<